Ukrainian Children Need to Talk about the War

Ukrainian Children Need to Talk about the War

Jan Kvapil

Journalist of Czech Salesian Media Center

(ANS - Ceské Budejovice, Czech Republic – May 2, 2022) – The Salesian Youth Center in Ceské Budejovice employs two Ukrainian women to run programs for Ukrainian children. Masha Shumkova is a teacher and Olena Halushka is a psychologist. Both of them used to work at a children’s center in Zaporizhia, Ukraine. What is the situation of Ukrainian children? What do they have to deal with? And how can we help people fleeing the war? Olena answered these and other questions.

Olena, what brought you to the Salesian Youth Center of Ceské Budejovice? 

I came to the Czech Republic in the second week of March. Our friend told us about the Salesian Youth Center. Masha and I were surprised when we arrived here because, in our city in Ukraine, we don’t have anything like this. Czech children must be so happy because they have this program and they may come here for free, get attention, and stay at a comfortable, safe place.

And how do Czech children react to you? You speak English or Ukrainian and they speak Czech.

With boys, I have no problem. I like to play soccer, and I agree to every game they suggest. With the girls, we paint and talk in English about some topics. 

How do programs work for Ukrainian children? Are Ukrainian children interested in participating in them? 

We divided Ukrainian children into four groups according to their age – from 4 to16 years – and we make different programs for each group. We focus on teaching mathematics, logic, and literature, or just have a little fun. The groups are already full. Besides that, we have a group for Czech kids on Monday.

And yes, they’re really happy to participate because they can speak Russian and Ukrainian with us. It’s the most interesting thing for them. And after that, they like to do something with others or exercise with what we prepared for them. Nobody wants to be alone. All kids pay attention and socialize. They’re just happy to be part of the group.

What is the experience of the Ukrainian children you work with? Do they need to talk about what’s going on around them? 

They do want to talk about the war, to talk about their worries. Once we were painting and talking about cats. One boy from Buca said: “I’m so worried about my dog. He stayed in Buca and I think he died.” And I said: “Nooo. Everything will be OK. He’s alive. I think he’s OK. Don’t worry.” And another boy immediately said: “War. Why does it happen? I keep thinking that when I come back, I won’t find anything, no buildings.” And I tried to reassure them both…. They are super serious about this topic and they want to talk about it. But at the same time, they want to have fun and play games, do things…. They aren’t shy. I think it’s because we speak Ukrainian, and they get more relaxed because of it.

Do you think they are traumatized? 

Not all of them; but yes, I saw around five traumatized children. I gave them a task: to paint an imaginary animal, to think of the superpowers it could have. Some children painted dragons with a superpower for killing and loads of blood around them. They don’t talk about their trauma, but you can see it in their paintings. Also, I remember two kids who came here and were extremely shy. They came from Donetsk and had experienced a lot of bad situations. They were afraid of communicating with other children. 

And how is the situation of Ukrainian children here in the Czech Republic? 

They are happy to be here, but not all of them find schools because there are not enough places in classes. So, they start online classes in a Ukrainian school. Some say they don’t want to go to school, but I insist with them: “You have to go”.  And they tell me about their new friends, what their names are, what they are doing. They’re open to making new friends here.

Not everyone can offer a place to live or money to the refugees. Is there anything that each one of us can do?

I think that everyone can say to the Ukrainian: “I am so sorry that this war is happening.” You can help every Ukrainian if you let him or her tell their stories. How was their first day of war? How was their journey from Ukraine to the Czech Republic? How many days did it take? What have they lost because of the war? And it is very important to say that this is a war. It isn’t some special operation like Russia says it is. For Ukrainians, it is important to hear others say: “I am so sorry that this war is happening, but I hope that everything will be all right with your parents, with your friends. Everything will be OK.”

It is normal. When I call my family, my friends, when I am scrolling on social media, everywhere is war, war, war, and war.… And sometimes I want to talk with someone who knows nothing about war and live some part of my life as normal life. Sometimes it really helps not to talk about war and instead talk about what to cook and what movie to watch next weekend. It really helps.

So, we can help Ukrainian refugees by talking to them about everyday life?

Yes. Sure, we can’t think about war 24/7. However, it’s very important to say that this is war, not a “conflict” or “special operation.” But I believe that normal life will be back, and everything will be OK.

I just want to say thanks to all the folks who help the Ukrainian people. You help us with everything, and you are so friendly. I understand that it’s hard sometimes. Thank you. And I want to say to all Ukrainians, that we will win, and everything will be OK.